So there are many of you who loyally watch these shows and, like me, make continual comments to the television whether anyone else is in the room or not. Alternately, there are many of you who do not have the time to keep up with reality TV – there are too many shows, your tivos runneth over, you have kids and can’t remember what it’s like to watch anything beyond Dora the Explorer (you know who you are) – but you also want to be “in the know.” That’s fine. Let me help you understand.

Thursday, December 6, 2012

The X Factor: On the Edge of...Something.

Tonight The X Factor's Top 6 contestant will sing for America's votes  twice. The first round will be "unplugged," and for Round 2, the viewers have made the song choice. More importantly, Khloe’s face matches her dress this evening, and my head already hurts. I don't know how much more of our hosts I can take, but we might as well get on with it.
 
 
Act: CeCe Frey
Team: Demi
Song: “Edge of Glory” by Lady Gaga
 
Oh my. This is my faaaaavorite Lady Gaga song. CeCe is worried tonight about not having a band or dancers to mask her vocals (should she have admitted that?). I actually really, really enjoy this. We’re back to “audition CeCe” who, back then, I thought could go all the way in this competition.
Judges Say: LA thinks he may have been wrong about CeCe and is starting to become a fan. Britney still hates her. Simon does not think CeCe is worth $5 million. Demi disagrees, saying this is one of CeCe’s best vocal performances. I am inclined to agree with Demi (what?).
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Act: Emblem3
Team: Simon
Song: “Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars

According to the brown haired Emblem3 member with the hat (I don't know their names. Who does?), this song “is right up our alleyway.” The blond one with the hood is kind of playing the guitar, but clearly he should not be allowed to sing alone. Ohhhhh. This is not good. The solos aren’t good, the harmonies aren’t good…no more unplugged for them. Ever.
 
 
Judges Say: LA says it was pretty good and he was impressed by their harmony. WHAT!? Britney thinks this was their best performance. Best performance tonight? What is wrong with these people? Demi doesn’t think it was the best, but she does think the group is a downgrade from the Jonas Brothers five years ago. Simon tells her she is dumb and the guys are young and relevant.
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Act: Carly Rose Sonenclar
Team: Britney
Song: “As Long As You Love Me” by Justin Bieber
 
I’m not someone who has Bieber Fever. In fact, I avoid those people as if they are part of a zombie apocalypse. This song, however, and this performance are both fantastic, and for a brief moment....I wish I new the words so I can sing along. Is there anything this kid can't do?
 
Judges Say: LA loves that Carly showed restraint and this may have been her best performance. Demi says this was better than Justin’s version. Take THAT, Mr. Reid. Simon says that finding people like her is why he loves working in America. Brit Brit thinks the most impressive thing about Carly is how she makes each song her own. See, I think the most impressive thing about Carly is how freaking talented she is for someone so young.
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Act: Fifth Harmony
Team: Simon
Song: “Set Fire to the Rain” by Adele
 
LA continues to say this group does not sing harmony, and he angers me each time he talks about these girls. Unfortunately, this performance pretty much consists of all solos….so, how are they going to be able to prove him wrong? Sigh.
 
Judges Say: LA says he didn’t hear any harmony (weird). Tonight I have to agree. Britney said it was a nice rendition but she doesn’t understand what separates Fifth Harmony from other girl groups. Demi feels that a couple of girls should just be solo artists. Um, that's what they were trying to do before The X Factor put them into a group. Simon is not happy with LA and says the girls have worked hard and gave a great performance.
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Act: Diamond White
Team: Britney
Song: “It’s a Man’s, Man’s, Man’s World” by James Brown
 
Diamond delivers on this song with all sorts of attitude. I was not the biggest fan of her "dance number" last week, but I think she is back with a vengeance here. Sure, we saw her sing this song during the audition rounds but definitely not with as much gusto. Will she be criticized for not branching out?
 
Judges Say: LA says Diamond brought attitude this week and he liked it. Demi thought it was risky, but she pulled it off. Simon says the performance was a little screechy in parts and wish she had chosen a different song. Britney tells Diamond she killed it. I wouldn't go that far...
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Act: Tate Stevens
Team: LA
Song: “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Bon Jovi
 
This is LA's song choice for Tate, and it's just all wrong. Tate does not look comfortable with it, and he isn't really on the same page with his backup singers. Perhaps they shouldn’t be going so high on the chorus when Tate is singing so low? Sorry, cowboy - this just doesn't work for me.
 
 
Judges Say: Britney feels he is getting away from what he does best. Demi believes she will buy his album someday, but she was bored and disappointed by him not taking on the high notes. Simon tells Tate he needs to choose the material from now on. LA disagrees and says he did a great job.
 
 
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Act: CeCe Frey
Team: Demi
Song: “Part of Me” by Katy Perry
 
Leopard print face is back! Woohoo! I wonder how Ke$ha feels about this performance. All CeCe is missing are the over sized glasses and bottle of Jack. This is better than “Lady Marmalade” last week for sure, and her confidence is....admirable? Is she the best left in the competition? Nah. Is she often fun to watch? Definitely.
Judges Say: LA says it was a karaoke performance. Britney was very entertained and loved it. Wow! Simon says she was defiant throughout the performance. He also says if she goes home, he’ll miss her. Demi thinks if Britney, who is "the Princess of Pop," said CeCe did a good job, she must have done a good job. Faulty logic?
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Act: Emblem3
Team: Simon
Song: “Forever Young” by Alphaville
 
This is clearly why Emblem3 needs background music, lights and screaming girls. The performance comes off sooooo much better that way. I still don't think the buff one with blond hair needs to have a solo....for any reason, but at least when they perform this way I can see the appeal.  I don't love the performance, but it's better than their first.
 
Judges Say: LA thinks they nailed it, and Brit Brit says it was a superstar performance. Demi wishes they would work the stage more. Simon says Demi gives silly criticism, and Emblem3 has landed.
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Act: Carly Rose Sonenclar
Team: Britney
Song: “If I Were a Boy” by Beyonce
 
Love it. Posting it. I hope she wins it all. Seriously.
 
 

 
Judges Say: LA says as a fan, she never lets him down. Demi calls it a phenomenal vocal but wants to hear something more upbeat. Simon says Carly has had a phenomenal night tonight (phenomenal is a popular word this evening). Britney thinks Carly is the definition of The X Factor. Mario says “Carly is Gnarly,” and I die a little inside.
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Act: Fifth Harmony
Team: Simon
Song: “Give Your Heart a Break” by Demi Lovato
 
I’m not just saying this because Demi often annoys me with her commentary…I like this version better than Demi’s. I think this group can be just as relevant as Emblem3, and at this point, I actually prefer them. Simon would probably be better off investing his time with Fifth Harmony at this point. Well done, ladies.
 
Judges Say: LA says this was Fifth Harmony's best performance. Woohoo! Britney thinks the performance was very good. Demi says this should have been their song instead of hers. Yes! Simon believes Fifth Harmony is a legitimate girl group.
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Act: Diamond White
Team: Britney
Song: “Diamonds” by Rihanna
 
Diamond is singing “Diamonds” in a giant diamond coming down from the ceiling. I guess they were really concerned we wouldn’t remember what the song was called. I feel like Diamond is trying to sing “Diamonds” exactly like Rihanna, and unfortunately for Diamond, she is not from Barbados and has a hard time mimicking Rihanna's phrasing. Maybe we should call in Melanie Amaro?
 
Judges Say: LA did not love Diamond’s rendition of “Diamonds.” Demi believes she did the song justice. Simon thinks the production was amazing, but the second half of the song was better than the first. Brit Brit says the song was made for her. See what she did there?
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Act: Tate Stevens
Team: LA
Song: “If Tomorrow Never Comes” by Garth Brooks
 
Annnnnnd, we're back. This song is perfect for Tate, and this is the type of music he should be singing. I'm not sure why LA threw us for a loop earlier with the Bon Jovi song, but this is a great way to close the show.
 
Judges Say: Pretty much everyone welcomes Tate back to the competition (he had been gone for about an hour and a half), except for LA who never thought he left to begin with.
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This week's results show will feature another double elimination, and we are only two weeks away from the finale at this point. Any of the judges could be swept away from the competition tomorrow, but is it likely that each one will be represented in the Final Four? Can Demi's "Lovatics" and CeCe's "Warriors" keep her in another week? Will the touting of Emblem3 hurt Fifth Harmony? We'll find out tomorrow - til then!

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